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This is the story that didn’t make it into the Silhouette short fiction contest at the Clarity of Night; the story I wrote and then changed my mind about and replaced with “Dangerous Games” instead. Entries have closed, now. The voting begins as does the waiting. Who cracks the nod? Who grabs the title? Somehow it’s less about the prizes and more about the prestige, with these contests.
But anyway… here you are, my poor little 250-words-or-less story that didn’t quite make the cut…
BEFORE TODAY’S DAY
“Josh, where are we going?”
“Wait and see. You’ll like it, I promise.”
Their footsteps crunch on brittle grass, scorched by the African winter. Where the big white thorns block their path he holds the branches so she passes unscathed. Pa taught him to look after his sister in the bushveld.
“Shit! Watch out for the puff adder sleeping under those leaves.” He holds the .22 rifle ready, just in case.
“You said shit. I’m going to tell Ma.”
“I’m older than you, I’m allowed.”
“I bet you wouldn’t say it in front of Pa.”
Josh breathes in sharply.
“Well Pa isn’t here. Look, see the buck droppings? Keep your eyes open. They use this track to get to the river. Come, we’re nearly there.”
Further up, they leave the path. Once through the barbed wire fence, he slings the .22 across his back and takes her hand. It is a long way to the bottom of the cliff.
“Are you mad?” Her whisper is a squeak.
“Trust me.”
Beneath an acacia tree they drop to their tummies and wriggle forward. The rocky ledge is hard and cold. Denying vertigo, they peer over.
“There!”
The eagle below rises from its nest to become a soaring, circling silhouette in the pre-dawn sky. Like a guardian angel, thinks Josh.
Sunrise splits the horizon, setting the heavens aglow and he remembers the day.
“We’d better go. Ma will be upset if we’re late.”
“For the funeral.”
“Yes.”
“Josh?”
“Yes, Rachel?”
“What’s a funeral?”
Lisa said:
I loved this, it felt like I was there!
Brigitte said:
Ah I love this one!
Makes me wish I had a big brother…
rose said:
Brilliant, now can you enter it as a novel so I can read more … 🙂
Janel said:
I like this one and the one you entered. Although, I do like the ending of Dangerous Games a little more.
Thanks for commenting on my story at CoN!
livewire said:
It has been so long since I’ve read your words… as usual, keeps me wanting more. {hinthinthint} =)
ylchong said:
For an entry that didn’t make it, it’s still a treat:) CoNgrats for one that made it 2CoN, let’s wait like an eagle or crow for re:) Desi
Terri said:
Lisa – Glad u liked it, and thanks!
Brigitte – I always wanted a big brother. (sorry Lee!)
Rose – Sure, I only need to pad it out by another 300 pages or so…
Janel – Thanks for taking the time to read and comment on this one! I’m glad to hear you say that ‘cos that’s precisely why I entered the other one, and not this one.
LiVEwIRe – Ahem. I’ll get right on it… 🙂
Terri said:
Desi – Thanks! And yep, I’m perched on the edge of my seat… 😉
Catherine said:
You got to get that book out!! The story makes you feel like you’re there, get writing missus, I really need a good book 🙂
Linda said:
Love it and your other one!!
Terri said:
Catherine – Yes ma’am! Nice to see you 🙂
Linda – Sheesh, if you guys carry on like this I might end up with an actual Ego! Thanks xx
Angel said:
Very nice. And I see your actual entry made it into the 40s club too!
Congratulations.